As a Father’s Tennis Journey Begins, Prominent
SoCal Coaches and Dads Share Their Advice

DeSean Holmes didn’t ask for it, but we figured there was no better time than on this Father’s Day to have some of the wisest of Southern California tennis coaches, who are also fathers, offer some good ‘ol dad advice to new junior tennis parent DeSean as he begins navigating the journey with his 7-year-old daughter Royce. 

But first, a little about DeSean and Royce and how the Holmes family got into the sport.   

DeSean and his wife Danielle are amazed at how Royce, in such a short amount of time, has fallen in love with the game of tennis, and has already dedicated herself to countless hours of on-court training.

DeSean said it all began when his family settled in to watch the movie “King Richard” on the life of Venus and Serena Williams. There was just one question Royce asked after the film. “She said, ‘Hey dad, I can still be a girly girl and still play tennis, right?’” DeSean recalled. “I was like, ‘Yeah, of course you can.’”

DeSean was a highly recruited football wide receiver out of high school and played at Florida Atlantic University under former USC head coach Lane Kiffin. “I grew up playing football and basketball, so she tried that,” DeSean explained. “She tried swimming, soccer, cheerleading, pretty much everything.”

But Royce kept coming back to tennis, and her enthusiasm was so high and she was so inspired by “King Richard”, the Holmes family decided to head to Florida in February for a week to meet the Williams’ junior coach Rick Macci, who was featured prominently in the film. 

“She got to see other girls her age and a little bit older doing what she wanted to do,” DeSean said. “My wife and I were just like sponges and tried to soak it all in and learn and see how his program is run.”

Headed into the second grade at Faith Baptist School in the San Fernando Valley, Royce is currently working with her private coach Rene Heger at the Paseo Club where she lives in Valencia. She already has a social media presence with 11.1K Instagram followers @Roycelunah.

The first person we checked into for some advice is an expert in the field, all-time winningest doubles team Mike and Bob Bryan’s father Wayne Bryan, who wrote the book “Raising Your Child to be a Champion in Athletics, Arts and Academics.”

In the book, Wayne reminds junior tennis parents to, “Always remember that being a Dad or Mom is your most noble calling and the most important work you will ever do.”

The elder Bryan offers: “Win, lose, draw, or rain out, always give your child your unconditional love.” and to always, “Stay positive and keep it fun. Tennis with a good group of other kids and parents – at practices and going together to tournaments and playing doubles and team tennis events – makes the tennis journey up the mountain so much more enjoyable and productive. Keep it social. Support the other juniors. Make them friends, not just competitors.” 

Wayne reminds that, “Teaching is not telling and talking, it’s creating a fun and enthusiastic and stimulating and warm and caring atmosphere.”

Also, “It’s not some brilliance or some wonderful talent or one big surge, it’s just the simple little daily habits that lead to greatness – and happiness.” 

“In your climb up the mountain, it is always important to stop from time to time and look out over the land below to see the beauty and to see how high you have climbed and how far you have come.” 

For years, Bryan has encouraged juniors to attend college matches because, “Attending one motivational tennis event is better than 30 days of practice.”

One of Bryan’s close friends is Bill Kellogg, the President of the La Jolla Beach Tennis Club. Kellogg has had some memorable experiences on the courts with family and has two daughters, Tiffany and Wendy, and seven grandchildren. Bill and Tiffany have won two USTA Gold Balls in Father/Daughter Nationals, and Bill has also played in  Grandfather/Grandson Nationals with Calvin (21) and Hayden (19). 

Kellogg’s advice to a junior parent is: “Don’t turn it into a job! It has to be the child’s dream, not the parent’s dream.”

USC Head Men’s Tennis Coach Brett Masi, who has raised a son (18) and daughter (16) who both played competitive tennis, said the dream has to be the child’s dream. “Let the kids make it about themselves and their journey. The players need to be motivated to push themselves and play as much or as little as they want. In the end, it will pay off the most and you will find out if the player truly wants it or not!” 

Jack Kramer Club General Manager Peter Smith and five-time NCAA champion at USC raised and coached three boys who played Division I tennis. “Find the best coach possible and trust them. Find one with a good resume that is connected to a good clinic so they can have privates and group hits. At the end of the day your kids want you as their father and supporter not as their coach.” 

Hank Lloyd, whose son Tom played for the University of Arizona in the early 2000s and is now the Loyola Marymount Men’s Head Coach, offers these useful tips to any tennis parent: 

1. Say Nothing! Just Listen.
2. Let them bring up the match.
3. Shake hands or hug and show them how much you care and love them.

Here’s my post-match Parenting Tips:

Child lost match: “Ok, you’re going to go out there and play that match again – What two things would you try or do you didn’t do in your match?

Player wins match: “What two things did you do your best at today?”

Longtime Santa Barbara tennis pro Mark Basham said a parent should realize that one of the greatest benefits of junior tennis is the friends that his child would hopefully make from the sport.

“I would also tell the father that competitive tennis can be rather self-absorbing and stressful so please encourage your child to have fun playing the sport, minimizing the importance of winning in the early stages especially,” said Basham. 

Longtime Billie Jean King USTA Girls’ Nationals 18s and 16s Tournament Director Lornie Kuhle has seen it all when it comes to tennis parents. 

Kuhle said: “There are no magic wands. There are no overnight successes. If you want your child to become a tennis player, it’s a full-time job and you have to dedicate yourself to a program. And this doesn’t mean playing once or twice a week. It’s pretty much something you have to work at almost every day, and it involves continual match play. Find the level for your child to where he can win at least one match out of every three that he plays.” 

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DeSean Holmes relays a story about Royce’s first-grade teacher asking her what her goal in life would be, and Royce immediately said, “I wanna win Wimbledon!”

“It’s definitely up to her if she wants to be a world champion – that’s always been her goal,” DeSean explained. “She got that from Serena and Venus and as a family we’ll try and help her accomplish her goals.” 

During the French Open, DeSean said Royce woke up at 5 a.m. and found tennis coverage with DeSean’s help. She would watch intently while eating a bowl of cereal. “I see other kids and they hop on to watch cartoons and YouTube and here she is watching her favorites like Frances Tiafoe, Coco Gauff, and Iga Swiatek.”

There’s no telling what the future holds for the precocious Royce, who plans to possibly play her first tournament at an upcoming Little Mo Regional. The roller coaster ride is about to begin and DeSean and Danielle Holmes are buckled in for the ride.